My World of Wonder

brat1519 @ 2006-05-15T22:51:00

2006-05-16T03:09:14Z

Have you every had one of those days that everything just hits you and you realize things that have been buried and you see them in a whole new light? Well I've had that kind of a week. Everything has basically gone to shit. In the short run at least, I've just had a typically week of hell. But thats not what i was really refering to. I was refering to the fact that i've been putting on an act for the past 6 months and didnt even realize it. I thought I was happy, I thought everything was going great, that i was well adjusted and had gotten over everything for the most part that has been bothering me. So much for that, it hit me like a ton of bricks, im in a state of depression, not dont jump to conclusions, its not like a suicidal depression or anything of that nature, its just depression, the lack of happiness, and no matter what i do, or how i try an talk myself out of it, nothing works. I can't shake this depression and its pissing me off. I dont know if the weather has anything to do with it, but i just want to be happy again, i want to go back to the days where my hardest class was Mr. J's American HIstory, and the days were the big social event was friday night football games, where my best friend was always there and our biggest crisis was our parents not letting us go to RK that week. I was to go back to the simple life, without all the heartache and without the depression, I want to be happy again. And i want to take down all the barriers that i keep up to prevent any more pain. I dont want to be depressed anymore.

Last night i was balling my eyes out after yet again another fight with my father, stupid shit, but it really got to me, and i just wanted to vent and cry and confide in someone that knows the situation. And the only two who could understand i've lost contact with. Which made me cry that much more. Mostly because i thought of the one person that i depended on and trusted and the only one that i could just run to and wouldn't need to say anything to, and he would understand. I just want to start over, I want to stop being so down, and i want a clean slate. I dont want to be the one that just burries it all and puts on an act of happiness, I want to BE happy, i want to enjoy everything the world has to offer whole heartedly and i dont want to push people away because im scared of being hurt. I dont want to be scared anymore. I dont want to hurt anymore. I just want to live life and cherish it.

Hopefully this summer will change things around...

brat1519 @ 2006-03-07T22:34:00

2006-03-08T03:42:43Z

Every Morning I wake up and realize that I'm not with you and my heart breaks all over again.

The saying goes, Don't settle for the one you can live with, but find the one you can't live without, I found the one I can't live without because my heart aches everyday not being a part of his life, but there's nothing I can do about it, and that makes it hurt that much more.

brat1519 @ 2006-02-26T02:52:00

2006-02-26T08:03:32Z

It's 3AM and im in such a GREAT MOOD, especially after the chaos and complete irritation i felt last night this is a welcome change, although im going on a small rant right now, that is after all the purpose of this thing, but my day has been great :-D. Let's see to start with I'm free and loving every minute of it, yeah there's those days that i miss the whole relationship thing, and yesterday was one of those days and the added bonus just made me flip a little bit. But my work makes up for it. I want to first of say THANK YOU to someone for *with* him i would have never gotten the job at Boston Billiards, thank you asshole, because you have made my life so much happier, well you did that before too, I should say you couldn't have picked a better time to do what you did because if not i would not be where I am today. Everything about my job just gives me this natural high, i go to work upset and frustrated and i leave with this smile and i couldn't be any happier (at least thats my thought process right now. ) But seriously ,everyone from the Managers to the bartenders to the desk to the other waitresses and the customers, it is just a FABULOUS place to work. But now for the rant...

You say that you can now tell a stanger you love them, well first off isnt that a bit um, oh i dont know, untrue, you can't LOVE a stanger , god , you didnt LOVE a girl you'd been seeing for a year, it makes no sense, and if you are talking about the 'love' that girls say to everyone then ok fine yea thats cool i guess, getting intouch with your feminin side i see..... and as for the whole you're not afraid to be at a stop light with the windows rolled down blasting kelly clarkson, all i have to say to that is WTF? because really now, you seemed embarrassed when i'd listen to it before, but now its ok? i restate WTF?

Ok so thats it for the rant, yes a short one i know, but i just dont really have the bitchy energy to go on. I'm in way too good of a mood and nothing can ruin it.

Goodnight to All. Sleep well

Shannon :-D

brat1519 @ 2006-02-09T22:06:00

2006-02-10T03:16:35Z

I saw this in someone's pf and thought it was cute and fitting....

sorry if i aint perfect
sorry i dont give a fUcK
    sorry i aint a diva
      sorry, just know what i wAnT
        sorry im not a virgin
          sorry im not a slut
            i wont let YOU break ME
think what you want!

brat1519 @ 2006-01-28T18:07:00

2006-01-28T23:16:13Z

Oh and one more thing this will be the last of it too, just because its over and im done waisting my time after this.... You said "its been 3 months" Well correction no it hasn't because you FLIPPED out when i started investing all my time with friends of the male gender, and so then we talked when i got home and you told me, a deal was made that we'd see how things would be at the end of january, granted you didnt hold up your end for whatever reason, oh wait, it wasn't valid right because i "caught you off gaurd" yea that was a nice one. But anyways It's the end of January, and obviously we can see where it lies, so don't think i was fawning over you for the past 3 months, it was just how things were constructed and it gave us both the time to realize that it wasnt going to happen. So that was that, Mr. Vain. Now I've really said all that could be said and if you still dont understand or realize any of what i was saying then a, your dense as hell, or b, you are really naive. Send me an email (although you wont) but i'd love to hear what you'd have to say. Lol. Ok byee now.

Shannon

brat1519 @ 2006-01-27T13:17:00

2006-01-27T18:31:38Z

Ok well as i said I will clear up a few things that i had left at the end of that last entry. I am no longer pissed so this entry will probably be a bit more calm than the last. To begin, the whole thing of the being married, well a, that takes two people, and i didnt want that as much as you did. And since we are on that topic, hun, You started all the talk, shit i remember you starting to talk future like in the first month and omg was i looking for the nearest door to run to. So you cant be blaming most of that on me cause you were definitely the one who started that. And the same old thing yea did get out of control, but i was always game for going out and doing something. Always. And I know the other thing was that you didnt want to go out cause of money and shit but dude i would have paid, and i know that its like taboo or something cause its an ego crusher but being together for as long as we were its ok for me to pay for somethings. Blah. ok so what else did you bitch about? the other thing, the whole you hanging out with you friends...YOU COULD HAVE DONE THAT, the whole point of everything is that all you needed to do was TALK, have a conversation, and let me know what was going on, You totally could have gone out with whomever, god knows i would have loved to have a couple of girls night out or hang out with the guys. Lets face it, we both made a lot of mistakes but whatever, i know now what not to do the next time around, although next time (meaning any relationship) isn't going to be for a while. Last thing, which is one that definitely needs to be mentioned is the idea that being a Bf is an Obligation. Reality check, Being a boyfriend is a choice, and you do things because you WANT to not because you HAVE to. That is a major misconception you have that you need to realize. Because otherwise its going to screw a lot of things up. So I said my piece, i'm done. And ya know what? do whatever it is you want, enjoy life, cause god knows im going to.

brat1519 @ 2006-01-26T10:22:00

2006-01-26T15:38:10Z

I hate it when theres so many things you want to say but you're so frustrated and upset that it all turns to babble, well theres a bunch i want to say but i haven't got the time right now, so i'm just going to bitch very quickly right now and im sure that i'll add more later. First off, what the hell are you doing reading this if you dont care? Seriously most people who break up wouldn't give to shits about the other person and deffinitley wouldn't be checking up on them reading everything of theirs. Another thing, you said something about the night you were supposed to go to the concert. Ok well here's the explaination for that.. you had just recently broken up with me, and well hello insecure now at that point and everything was lisa and i know she's your best friend and whatnot but you we're acting differently and it just upset me not to mention you didnt talk about it or anything you just kinda told me you were going, which wouldn't have been a problem but a, common courtesy would be to just talk with me about it seeing as i had to ask your friggin PERMISSION to hang out with my friends to not piss you off, and the one other thing was i was jealous. You were going to a concert, which was kinda like our thing, cause that was somehting major that we always did, we went to concerts, and it just felt like i was being replaced, Im sorry if it bothered you that you didn't go but a, if you were feeling as you were you still could've gone, and if you just TALKED about everything then it would have been fine, but the way you were acting was making me very insecure with everything so i was nervous sorry. But that was the explaination for that. I know youre not going to respond or anything but at least you'll hear what i have to say. Seeing as this is the only way i can talk and straighten everything out. A lot of shit happend since august, and things should have went differently but we can't change that now, but i just want you to know the truth. and one more thing to add just incase you haven't figured it out yet, I didn't cheat on you. ok well i gotta get going. I'll write more later.

(more to write, answer "married", rut, and other things of the like...)

brat1519 @ 2006-01-19T00:00:00

2006-01-19T05:16:18Z

Sitting here listening to my ipod nano, i realize that i hate shuffle and that i need to delete a few choice songs from the library...

1. Bryan Adam - Heaven

2. Firehouse - When I look into your Eyes

3. Telsa - Love Song

those are the three that i ended up listening to, trying to unrelate them and see if i could manage listening to them... didn't work so well. So many things ran through my mind, everything that encompassed this past year, and I have finally drawn a conclusion, one that reality can not give me, but nonetheless i have come to a conclusion.

I was watching Men in Black today, and thinking back on that movie, man do i wish i had one of those "flashy thingys" I would love to erase this past year and a half, nothing whatsoever has come out of it. Yes i had great times over this year, and im very fond of the memories, and i know that bad always comes along with the good, but i'd rather feel no good than to deal with the bad. Was it worth it? well how can something be worth it if nothing good came from it, there was good at the time, but all that changed, all the good turned to hurt and pain... so was it worth it? Well as it seems nothing is coming from this, so i guess not. And it is unbelieveably difficult to face that notion. It all meant so much. But and I quote "Now it all means nothing," way to be right? Just erase this past year, let me wake up and fine myself starting senior year all over agian, living my life, and not putting my heart out there to be smashed into a thousand pieces. I've been trying so hard to forget and move on, but then stupid innocent shit like the wrong song comes up on shuffle and throws me into this whirlwind. I've tried so hard, started to date, well attempted to, and it's not that there isn't people who want to, on the contrary, it is I that does not want to, no one matches up, no one sends that vibe, and yes it is early but the fact remainds that I do not care to date, there is no one else out there, at least i dont have the courage or ambition to even look. I don't understand the point anyways. To go back out there knowing you wont find that feeling again, at least not in the same manner, to be right back here again bitching to my online journal. Don't think so. So it may appear to some as giving up, but im looking at it from my point of view, a protective one at that, theres no sense in it. I have made myself sick over this, always upset always nausiated and im becoming bitter i dont want that. So under lock and key my heart goes, along with baracades and steel doors with alarms and countless other defenses. Its just not worth the pain. I thought it was once, and look where it has gotten me. Screw It. Someone please devise that "flashy thing" and erase my memory so i no longer feel this pain...

Goodnight, I'm going to attempt tosleep now...

Shannon

RANTING

2006-01-09T03:55:19Z

Why the hell is it that everyone wants what they can't have? Why do we work that way? I know that its human nature to desire things we can't have, that just keeps everything in progress, otherwise nothing would ever get done if no one strived for the unattainable, but still what the hell? GRR im so annoyed with everything these days, with myself, with school, with work, everything. Im just not content anymore, its so unsettling its not even funny, the worst part is that i had organized my life to a point, a while ago now, where one aspect was perfect, i had exactly what i wanted and i was happy about it, i could focus on striving for the unattainable aspects that i felt at the time i could almost grasp if i wanted to seeing as i had already acomplished one of my dreams. But the world turns, and everything goes upside down and now im back to square one, actually i dont think im even there, i think im two steps behind square one. I don't know what has gotten me to this point of ranting, but Im so frustrated! Also like ok, so the whole every where i turn theres people being lovey dovey enough to make one sick, which isnt helping matters, and im here like grrr so what do i do? fine ok "time to move on" sure ill try it why not right? whats the worst that could happen? well lets see how that works out..... i had 2 dates this weekend that i cancelled on, with no reason honestly just that i didnt want to go, and i had another one today that i forced myself to go on because i ditched the others, and to tell ya the truth it was not bad, i had some fun, but i dont want it, I dont want any of it. I dont have any interest in dating, which sucks cause i could have had a very nice dating curve again, but thats screwed up cause in short... I DONT WANT ONE. i dont want to date, i dont want to get to know anyone else, i dont see the point in it, my hearts not there so i dont want to be setting anyone else up for a let down ya know? so fine i'll stay single and just focus on other things, focus on work and what not....easier said than done, everyone has dating or bf/gf stories, people are being lovey dovey, and its not even spring yet..... not to mention i really miss the small things, the things you can't do with just friends and things you cant do on just a date cause its not the same its not that level, i miss the small cuddling things i miss having someone's arms around me, i miss feeling cared for. I dont know where this is coming from I've held it in, i've held all this in for a while now and im just breaking down, I want to scream, I hate it that i lost the one thing that i cherished most, i feel like such an idiot for it to. I dont know what went wrong i dont know how i messed up, but i miss it. But i'm going to have to move on, sooner or later, because he doesnt care and doesnt love me, so that leaves me here, yelling at a computer, great time huh? Alright well my throat is sore, and im kinda tired. But god knows i'll be up for a while, ttyl byee

brat1519 @ 2006-01-05T21:34:00

2006-01-06T02:38:32Z

I love you

brat1519 @ 2006-01-05T02:06:00

2006-01-05T07:11:58Z

Ok so check this.... been working at Boston Billiards now for a week, 6 days actually, and have gotten 4 numbers and have been hit one countless times... its amazing for me to be getting all this attention, i just dont think i am one of those girls ya know? but heres the twisted part, as flattered as i am, you are still the only one i thats on my mind, grrrrrr lol!

brat1519 @ 2005-12-29T23:05:00

2005-12-30T04:08:24Z

GRRRRR damn computer just erased a fine good rant, wow way to really piss me off, I'm too upset right now to re-type it, ill type it later, probably tomorrow, but heres how it began....GROW SOME BALLS, and stoping listening to everyother person in this world, and start listening to your heart!

CONFUSION!!

2005-12-27T03:30:32Z

Bite Me?! yea i guess that could work... What the Hell? Nothing makes any friggin sense anymore all the shit that would make me happy now brings tears to my eyes, and all the shit that used to bother me doesnt, I'm so upside down and inside out i dont know what I am doing. I really tried. I really did try and sit idlely by, I want to too, but I can't with out any ground to stand (sit) on. How can one be expected to just sit by if they dont even know if there is even a chance or a reason to? I know I said I would, and I am, but it is really taken a toll on my emotional state, it hurts, a lot, and i dont even know why, as far as small things are concerned. In other situations its hard yet easy, yea it hurts, but one can get over it, and soon being with other people eases the pain, and you move on. Nuh uh, not this time, hanging with other people is just pushing me back and making me realize exactly how much I want, and need, and truly love him. This isn't some small infatuation or crush, its the real thing, and it hurts for so many reasons, but they are all a blur at the moment. I just wish there was an answer, a definite answer, because not knowing me is killing me, not having the one you love, love you back kills too, but at least it leaves you with an answer, not a nice one, but nonetheless an answer.

I truly do love him, I just wish things could get back to us and being happy, i'm tired of this rollercoaster....

Long Day

2005-12-24T04:16:54Z

So its been a while since i've completely updated this, but im just going to dive into my day today... Alright well I actually went back to wachusett today with sean to see old teachers and stuff like that, it was pretty cool, nice to be out of there though, the contstruction is horrible. But that was most of my day, then I swung by Boston Billiards, looking to get a waitressing job there, i gotta go back on monday for an interview cause it was just way too busy today. Then i went to work which went by way too slowly...

However, I just was reading over old entries on Nick's LJ, wow it was all such a long time ago, but i cherish those days endlessly. I dont likw being left in the dark and i have no clue whats going on. I've become very insecure, more than before to the point that it hurts and nothing is even going on, like I've become insecure in my day to day life not in just relationships and stuff like that. I just want to fix everything and have everything go back (or forward whichever) to happiness...

"When you left I lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe
Come back baby, please
Cause we belong together

Who else am I gon' lean on
When times get rough
Who's gonna talk to me on the phone
Till the sun comes up
Who's gonna take your place
There ain't nobody better
Oh, baby baby, we belong together

I can't sleep at night
When you are on my mind
Bobby Womack's on the radio
Saying to me
"If you think you're lonely now"
Wait a minute
This is too deep (too deep)
I gotta change the station
So I turn the dial
Trying to catch a break
And then I hear Babyface
I only think of you
And it's breaking my heart
I'm trying to keep it together
But I'm falling apart

I'm feeling all out of my element
I'm throwing things, crying
Trying to figure out
Where the hell I went wrong
The pain reflected in this song
It ain't even half of what
I'm feeling inside
I need you
Need you back in my life, baby

When you left I lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe
Come back baby, please
Cause we belong together

Who else am I gon' lean on
When times get rough
Who's gonna talk to me on the phone
Till the sun comes up
Who's gonna take your place
There ain't nobody better
Oh, baby baby, we belong together, baby"

Mariah Carey - "We Belong Together"

My heart has broken into so many pieces and everytime i try to put them back together it falls a part again.... Anyone got any good super glue? Cause the shit im using isn't working....

I really do love him with all my heart, and i dont know if its hurts more because we are broken up, or because i do love him so much.....

Love is such a screwed up thing, it always ends in pain.......but somehow, it's all worth while right? Cause i know I couldnt live without it... I'd rather be in pain for the rest of my days and know what it truly is than to never have experienced this at all....

Ok before i get any worse.....

Goodnight

brat1519 @ 2005-12-23T01:36:00

2005-12-23T06:38:04Z

No matter what I do, all I think about is you.

I would wait forever, for there is no one that could take your place...

brat1519 @ 2005-12-11T13:52:00

2005-12-11T18:53:17Z

Well a lot has happend since the last time i posted an entry but i dont have enough time to catch ya up on it lol.. I just wanted to post something i wrote the other day and I remembered that i have one of these lol. Ok so here is it: My thoughts on the concept of "meant to be"

What does it mean “meant to be?” Do you even believe in Destiny or Fate? How do you know when you found the one person that was “meant to be?”

My answers, Yes, I do believe in Destiny, and its actually quite easy to know when you’ve found that person you were “meant to be with.” You know you’ve found the one, when you turn down the one guy that meets every one of your standards, that’s gorgeous and sweet and good natured, and affluent that could give you everything you ever wanted. When you turn that man down, for another that plagues you mind day in and day out, when you turn him down for someone that may not be able to give you, your most extravagant desires, but it doesn’t matter, because you know that you most extravagant desire is to have him. When all the money, fame, affluence, and security means nothing, when you’d rather just live a normal comfortable life, as long as you have your one. At that moment, when you come to that fork in the road, the one path leads to everything you have ever dreamed, the other, the one that you take because you know in the end it is the most worth while, it is the path where you choose the life that may not give you everything thing in the world but it doesn’t matter because you know that, that life is much more wealthy than anything else in the whole world. That’s how you know that you’ve found your one. Simply put, you can feel in your heart all the happiness in the world with that one man, and have no desire for anyone else, because you know that no one else in the world could give you anything more than what you have. That’s how you know you’ve found the one.

Ok so there it is.

Ttyl

Always
Shannon

The End of a Familiar Era

2005-06-13T15:27:03Z

So its been two days since graduation and i havent broke down like i thought, leaving everything i once knew so well behind, not knowing whats going to happen next, getting used to a whole new routine. But i guess it has a lot to do with the people who have been there this year. The one thing i thought was going to make this progression very difficult was a long lasting friendship, but that had dissovled into a non-existent one. So that's not tying me to this place anymore. Its funny, how fast life changes, and things one once knew so very well, can suddenly disappear out of know where. Anyways moving on, Graduation was pretty good. It went by really fast and it was great when the beach balls went up, and also how can you forget the dive Mr. Guerin gave to retrieve the beach balls that had fallen out of reach of the graduates to appease Dr. P. It was a great time. The organization of the whole event could have been better, trying to leave the "graduate only" room and get into the lobby was horrible... 393 graduates on one side of a standard size door trying to push there way through only to find a mob of parents and relatives of those 393 graduates. Needless to say that was a fun time. ( hint of sarcasm). My graduation party is next weekend. The 18th. Hopefully everyone can make it. A few people are having difficulty because their party ended up being scheduled also on the 18th or other friends of theirs, their parties ended up being on the .... 18th lol. So thats that. But its ok. Alright well im off... i have to do some cleaning and lovely things like that. Theres a good chance ill update more later.

Shannon

I love you Nick!

brat1519 @ 2005-05-27T12:30:00

2005-05-27T16:32:13Z

WOW! I can't believe it! Finally Done with school! I have only 3 finals Next week.... Drama, Enconomics, and Espanol. Today was Senior Breakfast, and i got pictures with the people who matter... the Funny thing is you see everyone so emotional... I guess it really hasnt hit me yet... even with my cap and gown in hand, i havent felt anything remotely like sadness... I will miss people but i figure we will keep in touch through IMs... The only person that i will miss is nick, my baby, but we have all summer and im not so far away to the point where i wont be home like EVERY weekend, or where he cant come up to UMass. We'll Deffinately be together. Im actually really happy that all the work aspect is done for school though and i have a summer to do what needs to be done to prepare for college. It was suprising how fast things ended... previous years you have seniors that leave then the work load gets lighter then you ease into reviewing for the final and the last week is just goof off, making sure everyones ok for the final and that's it. Not this year... i was working on projects monday night hoping that i would be able to get everything finished for thursday, the last day... things went by so quick. As far as people go, you know who you are that will be Missed, Rick, Erin, Heather, Matt F., Mikey, Lindsay, and everyone else who has been such good friends this year, I love you all! ok well i hope to see you at Prom and hope to see you all on our last day as Wachusett students, June 11, GRADUATION! WE ARE THE CLASS OF 2005!!!!!!!!

Forever,

Shannon

brat1519 @ 2005-01-18T19:18:00

2005-01-19T00:35:17Z

Deffinately time for an update....well where to begin.... SHINEDOWN in consert the 10th of december was AWESOME!! such a great night. . . Then Christmas. . . that was good too. .. i got some good stuff from the fam, and Nick got my this beautiful yet simple silver bracelett that i love! New Year's was a lot different then the years past as far as first night goes, it was dead this year not much going on and also it was the first year that i wasnt part of the trinity youth group. But thats ok cause i spent the night with nick, and his friends Byron and Brian which was funny, i really enjoyed it. Although i could have done without the "incident" lol i received a black eye on accident from nick as a result of byron stealing his wallet, thanks! lol but it was all good no big deal. But we all left before midnight. . . Nick and i went back to his house, and watched the New Years thing on TV. Nick i love you! ;) then i went home and that was new years. Lately there hasnt been much thats new, working a lot and when im not at work im at nicks. he's the best no arguement! Midterms are this week . i had psych today not that bad. .. Economics tomorrow... then i can get my TIRES for my car! about damn time!! lol although there is much more that needs to be done to it... and now for the best part. . . Starting Feb 12, winter carnival, 14th Valentines day, then the 21st my 18th birthday!!! then the 25th SHINEDOWN AND TESLA in CONSERT! and then on march 5th . . . MOTELY CRUE! That 30 day period is going to be AWESOME! and im going to be so burnt out! lol ok so i think thats about it for an update at least for now. . . Ly!

Shannon

Update

2004-11-29T03:58:31Z

Ok time for an update. . . it is now two weeks, and four days almost exactly that ive been dating this awesome guy, Nick. He's the best.. im really happy. Although i dont understand how i could deserve such a great guy. hes a sweetheart. :-D Im so lucky. lol * must thank alex lol who takes all the credit * ok so besides that update. . . i got him an early christmas present . . . tix to SHINEDOWN which is in 12 days which is also a bit ironic cause it is the same day that him and i will be going out for one month . . lol ok im tired and going to babble so i will stop and write more later. lyl byee

bRaT

Pre-Battle of the Bands

2004-11-06T21:44:28Z

Hey!! yea ok i know this hasnt been updated in a long time.. what can i say im just a busy grl! lol anyways I'll catch you up... Chris in maine...hehe..... but yea i went up and visited Chris that was a blast... right now theres someone i work with whos cute that i kinda like.. lol ok so thats as far as an update goes... Im still exhausted cause i worked till 10 last night and then had to get up and go take the SATs this morning... my alarm went off at 5:30 instead os 6:30 so needless to say i wasnt happy and then the gave me the wrong coffee and by the time i realized it it was too late and it was disgusting so i didnt even get coffee... lol now im headed to the Battle! its at St Mary's in Holden and A Third Voice, 16" Oscillator, and Beware of the Dog are playing... and some others.. this is going to be awesome... ill write more when i get home... and fill yea in about the boys lol.. .ttyl ly byee

bRaT

Just an Update

2004-10-20T02:57:25Z

Hey... what has happend recently? nothing exciting... well... i dono.. it might be.. lol Anyways Homecoming was pretty good. i hung out with Alex all night and jane and all her friends it was really cool.. I drove alex, lynn and her bf steve.. we had such a blast. oh btw alex i still have your dresses from homecoming and lynns minor crisis.. lol lynn i love you! lol After homecoming.. nothing much has happend... 'cept i went back to maine for the day and saw all the guys... i love it up there... but i saw zach, talked to him fora lil bit... talked to adam... which he was the one who actually started conversation.. there was also chris.. he's awesome lol im going back to maine saturday to visit! lol yay! anyways ... what else has happend? well this kid aaron got a job at big y.. hes pretty cool.. funny.. him and his girlfriend are really cute together but i think there in a fight right now... hopefully they'll work it out cause i think he really likes her and she him. But im staying out of it... he's a cool kid to talk to but i wouldnt say anything more than that... well thats basically it for the update... ill write more later.. ly byee

bRaT

brat1519 @ 2004-10-08T22:46:00

2004-10-09T02:52:36Z

Well i have completely forgot to update this..... the 26th was LOCOBAZOOKA... which absolutely kicked ass! i got a shinedown drumstick at the end of their preformance... which ROCKED!! and so did the final artist SALIVA!!! it was AWESOME.... lets see anything happen since then?? not really... i got moved to the booth at work so i've been working till 10 a lot which actually isnt too bad... especially with the people who are normally there.... its cool... im tired... and theres really nothing going on lately... but homecomings tomorrow night.. and im going... no date though... but thats fine.. now i can do whatever... ok so im going to stop my incoherent babble.. and go ... ill upadte more later.. byee

bRaT

First Day Back

2004-09-01T18:51:58Z

SCHOOL.. lovely... today was our first day back.. and the first days are always a bit confusing... well now add freshmen.. and then Construction.. this is going to be a marvelous year! My sched and classes are pretty cool... minus spanish but im switching that so things will be good tomorrow. I love where my locker is... its like dead center in the Senior hallway its great.. and i managed to collect only 2 books today... another plus.. marks back in school.. i saw him at the end of the day today...he got his lip pierced.. ( i must say he's looking reallllly good lol) well not much to do tonight... going to JJs but first im going sleep fora bit.. ill ttyl byee

bRaT

brat1519 @ 2004-08-30T23:29:00

2004-08-31T03:30:27Z

Life Sucks!